Please get your lives together, teachers.

This one is dedicated to all the teachers out there. No, I’m not going to do 90’s style rap number. Readers beware I may embark on an endless journey of swear words. No turning back, I’m afraid.

To be honest guys, this is about one particular teacher. My Physics teacher. I’m sick of her. I am genuinely done with all her fucking bullshit. She is supposed to impart her knowledge and expertise onto me. Is that hard to comprehend? Hard to believe that someone who can get through a university degree of Theoretical Physics cannot do this.

Nightly, I waste countless hours of my precious existence completing homework which is tremendously irrelevant to my exam syllabus. Most of the time, I complete the work days advance because that’s just the wonderful and ambitious pupil that I am. Now, I am not complaining about all homework because truly some of it is beneficial (from OTHER subjects). But, this one teacher decided to give me a detention because I had forgotten to complete one of her imbecilic pieces of work. My first detention ever, in my entire 16 years.

Bitch. No. Revoke that shit. 

Here’s little history on this particular human who is stealing my air. She never marks our (my class) books, because she claims to be so overloaded with work. Well, EXCUSE ME, I have no idea what that feeling is. I ONLY have 11 exams which I need to commence revising, for trial exams, 4 pieces of coursework to complete, 4 controlled assessments in the next two weeks and extra-curricular activities. MY SCHEDULE IS FUCKING CLEAR BITCH, SO KEEP PILING UP THE WORK.

Our lessons are spent doing insignificant practical work such as: finding the mass of a creme egg using only 3 pieces of equipment or trying to protect an egg from a 10ft drop using only paper, furry wire and popsicle sticks. In-sig-fucking-ni-ficant. This isn’t even the extent of my problems, it has been going on for 2 years and I am 100% sure that myself and the rest of my class are almost completely incapable of answering physics-related questions correctly.

I have a fucking GCSE exam to prepare for and you’re wasting my life away. This is, however, besides the point. There is no punishment for her incompetent-ass. Why is there a double standard? If you do not mark my homework (a job which you are paid for) then there is no fucking way that you’re going to give me a detention for forgetting to do your work. Do your fucking job, insubordinate. There is no excuse. Can you believe that this woman has the nerve also make jokes about the fact that she doesn’t mark our work?

“If I don’t mark your books this time everyone is getting chocolate”. 

BITTTTTTTTTTTTCH, I want a good grade not some cheap-ass candy. Also, can I just point out that if this is a necessary method of compensation then at the very least, buy me some RICHART.

Let’s see which one of us has a detention record when I’m done reporting your ass to your superiors, bitch. Hopefully technology will advance for the better, most specifically the development of a time-machine which I can use to ensure that her mother swallows. However for the time being, I can only hope that people learn from their mistakes.

I have a few other problems with teachers that I wish to address, but this blog post has aggravated me so much I don’t think my keyboard could bare the slamming. Gawd, have mercy.

Please enjoy my playlist of the week: 

  1. Azealia Banks- Chasing time.
  2. Azealia Banks- Soda.
  3. Azealia Banks- Ice Princess.
  4. Bo Saris- Shoes.
  5. Bad- Wale feat. Rihanna
  6. Nicki Minaj- Only & Bed of lies sample.
  7. Romeo- Como Animales.


  1. Hahaaaaa. I hope you’ve vented well. I’d be careful, with writing as funny as this people are going to catch on to your blog. And then one day BAM, ole miss will see it and you’ll get a drastic eyebrow raise.You’ll have to explain (to her and possibly your parents, depending how high up on her horse she gets) why she got such an epic number of t’s in the beginning of that paragraph.


    • Ahaha, thanks for reading! I’m glad it was funny, it was only irritating for me. I can only hope more people will read these posts, sometimes I feel as though I’m writing for the universe’s superior beings because nobody ever comments. Anyway, let ole miss come for me! I’m ready. The gawdssssss have prepared me.


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